letting my heart speak

I’m waiting for her reply. The moment my thumb sanctioned a down stroke on the key in my mobile, that its software rendered as send button, is one of the toughest and joyful moments of my life.

It was tough because the act was potent enough to change the course of my life, might be pleasant or its antonym. And I’d to prepare myself to face either face of the change. It was a costly gamble, I staked a good friendship and presumably the trust of one, among the few best personals I wished (and more than that) to be a part of my life.

It was joyous because I let white pigeons fly in my mind stopping the clash of thoughts, whether to spell my heart to her or not. The clarity in me woke up after a long nap unleashing that, to me a friend is someone who doesn’t stops with accepting me “as what he/she perceives I’m” but goes ahead accepting me “as what I’m actually”.

I don’t need a power glasses to see my thoughts clearly, provided I’m relaxed and shut out from the world of any minor cent of distraction. It usually happens when I’m in bed where I could just see the black of the darkness or in a calm early morning rest room (yup, my poor roommate crib about it always). Splendid ideas of my life had born at either of these place.

It’s there I made a call between the choices I was debating over and over, and decided to speak my heart to her.

Why I choose to text her? I don’t know. Is that the best way to go about it? I didn’t gave thought about it. Straightaway I started composing the message. Every word was carefully chosen just to reflect my thought without any refraction or diffraction. And it took shape like this.

My heart says ‘go for it’. Thinking consequently I may lose a friend. For a moment snapping the thinker in me, {her name} I’m wondering how gr8 it would be to have you as my life partner.

Felt like capturing the ‘joy’ as fresh as it was just after hitting the send button, and so is this writing. Moment worth living.