“Among air-hostess, Kingfisher’s are most catchy” a commonly prevailing comment. But I don’t feel so, for that matter I don’t feel any other women appealing to me other than Neethu. I’m suffering from this ‘insensitivity’ problem right from the day I saw her.
We are flying back to Chennai, to celebrate first anniversary of “the day we met”. Sitting next to me, she is sleeping on my shoulder like a child in womb. I’m just enjoying her cuteness overwhelmed in sleep, that will put kitten’s cuteness in shame.
The long flight made her tired, so cautiously I asked the cabin crew not to interrupt us with any offers, hence may disturb her nap. Still, a brief turbulence caused the flight a sharp jerk, ensuingly she shivered-up . In that instant, abrupt pull-off from her deep sleep, left her uncertain, looking all around, expressions filled with questions and a untold fear. The moment her eyes caught me, the emerge of reassurance was vivid. With that she shed her ‘easy smile’ to me, wordlessly conveying “you, complete me”. This ‘smile of her’ often gave color and meaning to my life. After answering her smile with mine, I gently put my hands on her face and made her to lay back on my shoulder again. With my tender pats she slept soon, taking me back to paradise.
A year and a day back……………….
The symptoms of stomach growing into belly made me resolute upon early morning jog. Though I resolute a week before, last night sight of topless me in mirror waked me early in morning. Geared with tracks and shoes, lethargically I walked to the beach road. When I stepped into the beach, the very sight of blazing sun coloring the silver sea with its orange, whipped off my morning sluggishness. The tides were pondering to clear off the footmarks of joggers, as if angered, “how dare you people leave you footprints on my land”.
Wild barking of a dog, took off me from the seduction to nature. A girl, probably counting her teen days, made no match to the size of her pet she was holding, the dalmation. It ran behind every dog in the beach, pissed everywhere it liked, dragging her all the way behind it. Her try to cover-off the slight embarrassment of being troubled like this in front of few boys in beach and her struggle to keep the dog under control, added humor to my fresh morning mood.
An elderly couple were about to cross me, when then lace knot of the old man’s shoes went-off. His aged plump physic demands a painful and heavy effort to sit down to tie the lace. Though his wife too shared the same profile, told, “ I’ll do it for you darling”. When she sat down, there was a brief shrink in her face and bit tip of her tongue out of pain of her back or knees, which I don’t know. But she didn’t advertise it. When she was done, the old chap lifted the gran, after a short moment of unsteadiness. Then they both laughed at each other. That laughter was eternal and life filling.
Before wading-off from the thoughts of merriness of a having a partner, stirred by the elders, I saw Neethu for the first time, too far to recognize the face. In a professional jogging suite, with her friend approaching my side in about fifty feet, even then I could hear the residue of their quibble and giggles over the sound of waves. “MR.BeGoodBoy” in me, told me, ”hey, don’t glue your eyes on the girls” and so I obediently continued as if I had not noticed them.
But when we neared to ten feet, suddenly the converse between the girls stopped. That raised my antennas. My common sense told me, the girls felt my presence. Though I walked unnoticing, when we were about to cross each other, my curiosity trained my eyes on her. And our eyes met. I went thoughtless for that moment. She was the life of the image etched in mind, her look and the confidence & clarity it radiating . Moments later I realized, we both were walking backwards facing each other.
With my logical thinking went blunt, not knowing what to do, I just turned back and walked in my course, in a state of ecstasy. She was filling my mind slowly, and at a point she made the cytoplasm of all my thinking cells. I guess after five minutes, reality took me and told, “hey, you may miss her” and added “go and find her”. But my bad time, I was not able to spot her in the intense crowd of morning walkers. My heart urged me saying “hey, how come, it was just few minutes back she was here, she will be some were here”. But she was perfume sprayed into the air, I was not able to find her.
With an irrational instincts reassuring , we are for each other and so she will come here for me tomorrow, I want to office that day. I lingered with the thoughts of the way we looked each other, the openness in that which deliberately told, “I like you”. That openness is a rare commodity in girls.
When I was preparing to leave the office early, so I can sleep early and hence I can wake-up early in the next day morning, Vibhore, a friend of mine ringed to my mobile, “Nanba”, he started enthusiastically in a heavy accented Tamil and without allowing me to interject continued in English, “I’ll pick you for the dinner, and we can go to theater then”. Ooooooooooooops, that second show for “Shivaji” was planned a long back. Being form north India he was ignorant of our movie star Rajinikanth. It was me who created a great hype for Rajini to Vibhore, and promised to help him with the language to watch the movie. These kind of commitment cannot be give-up.
And it was around 2.30 am when he dropped me in the home. Hardly slept, in the early morning my eyelids refused to open-up, with a feel of eyeballs plunged into the burning acid. But the fear of losing her (and hence seemed like losing the life) brought me to my feet. I went to the beach road and sat along the beach near the road entrance.
After three couple of ten minutes, still without any sign of her, my courage started to sore down. I went to the less frequented entrance on the other side of the road so as not to give any chance. I didn’t wanted the situation or ego to hinder me from reaching her. So to takeover them, I started to wander hastily among the walkers and joggers. The time passed enough, for that the mild morning sun had started to through-off its crouching rays.
I stood beside the sea shore for a while letting the waves to run across my legs as to cool-off the wrath I had on myself , for misreading the girl and for missing even the last bus to office, wandering around beach expecting her.
When I started to walk thought the beach towards the road, a cab came along the beach road and pulled up. To my sky touching joy, it was Neethu who got down from the cab, and the cab left behind her. She stood there looking at me, with no energy left in her even to wave at me, holding her handbag carelessly with one handle while the other swing outside. Her crumpled formals told, it was not just a night shift she worked but well form a day. Slowly she walked (or in better terms, dragged herself) towards the beach, and kneeled on the beach sand, the instant she reached them, with no more potency left in her for another step. I walked to her, kneeled next to her, and after moments of exchanging a assured look, I took her face by her baby soft cheeks. And it was then she smiled her “easy smile” first ever time to me.
cheers :-)
deepak p
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